Responsible Capitalism

I was about to make this blog all about the shining star that Whole Foods Markets have become and it's CEO, John Mackey, has the right to voice, write and have opinions that run contrary to our current administration's. I was going to point out that Mr. Mackey is running a company that is a shining example of how responsible captialism is and should be run. And perhaps it is. From all outward evidence, Whole Foods Markets are largely responsible for making us all conscious of organic foods, our environment, what we are eating and feeding our families, and providing high quality produce and hard-to-find items. It seems to be the best of what business should be about and America at it's best.

Capitalism is not evil. But people are corruptable. Systems may be good but they have holes. It doesn't mean we need to throw the baby out with the bath water. Protest the people that become greedy and take advantage of a system. Protest the holes in the system. We don't have to throw out everything that has worked well in the past. The past is not a bad thing. We don't need to be digging up dirt on our nation's founding fathers to prove the whole foundation is corrupt. It seems to me that the people that really didn't appreciate the Right passing moral judgements on behavior and legislation is doing the exact same thing. The Right called war protester Cindy Sheehan "unAmerican". Now the Left is calling those that aren't agreeing with every aspect of the healthcare reform coming from Washington "unAmerican". This country was built on protests, debate, difference in opinions and compromise. It has never been 100% one side or 100% the other side. We have become a country where everyone thinks everything has to be 100% one side or the other, black and white, right and wrong. If you truly consider most issues, there is gray middle ground to some degree. Nothing is clear cut. And what makes that gray matter is our morality. We all have it. We all have opinions about it. We all embrace our own beliefs about that morality.

You may be asking about now, how is all this related to what I started talking about with Whole Foods Markets and John Mackey? Well, as much as I was wanting to extoll his virtue and business accumen with a planet responsible business, I found the story where the FTC is investigating the fact that Mr. Mackey anonymously posted comments and predictions online regarding his competitor, Whole Oats" stock prices and it's future of being acquired by another business. Now, Mr. Mackey is arguing that this activity was innocent and a number of years ago, long before his own Whole Foods recently acquired Wild Oats. I suppose we all make mistakes in the past. He IS only taking $1/yr salary and a total benefit package of only $33K, much less that a majority of Americans make and live on. I choose to take the good that Mr. Mackey is doing and build on it. I suspect that none of us could take a harsh scrutiny of every thought and action throughout our lifetime and come out smelling like a total rose. It takes a little compost to make those roses grow! Sorry, I couldn't resist.

Know me? Then you already know this

Please tell me I'm not alone in this! I was on my way back home today from a week-long vacation following our son's drum corp at the World Championships. More about that soon. But we were in the car, it's a lovely, althought hot, day. I'm gloating that we have a reliable car and air conditioning. In the occasional conversational exchange we get with our 19 year old son, he says something lighthearted and clever. It had something to do with his summer of touring. It immediately struck me as a great subject for me to write about. Something very different from my other things so far. It will be a very easy, just throw it on paper in five minutes kind of subject. Should I write it down to remember it? I decided, na...even I can remember this one. I stress the "even I" portion of this thought because anyone and everyone that knows me in the past few years will attest to the fact that I can't remember squat. I do make lists. I live by lists. I've even done mental exercises to improve my memory and it does work..... as long as I remember to do it.

So, back to my fab blog subject. I'm home now, computer open. I even remember that I have a great subject ready to impress the world with. But then I realize....crap. I don't remember. I go do a couple of small errands to give myself a few minutes to pull it out of my mind. Crap. The only thing I find is the deafening silence of all the crickets chirping into my nothingness. Nothing.

So let this be my lesson to all of you. If you have a great idea....or even just a good one, WRITE IT DOWN! Crap.

Still not understood

I'm going to put it out there. Ready? I'm 50 years old. And I'm a female. There, I said it. Really, I don't feel "old" even though all the "jokes", which by the way are not funny, about how we physically change and all the maladies surprising us all with their sudden appearance complete with all the painful creaks, pops and pain, have reared their ugly heads.

There's alot of real information out there, along with all the jokes, but you know what? A majority of doctors still don't take us seriously. And our husbands still have absolutely no clue what we are really going through. Both subsets of the male species, pass over us. When we do try to express the physical or mental conditions we are going through during this period of life, both glaze over and it passes right over their heads. They say "uh-huh" alot and do everything short of patting us on top of the head to either change the subject or the channel. After twenty-two years of marriage, I HAVE come to understand that men, generally, need to "fix" a problem and if they can't, they don't really want to hear about it. Doctors do have an advantage that husbands don't. It's called a prescription pad. And you know what it is they do to "help"? They conclude that we are simply suffering from one or another form of depression and given one or more meds for anti-depressives, or anxiety, or, or, or. And many times it goes from "or" to "and"! DOes the underwhelming result prove it works? I seriously doubt it. I know a number of ladies my age and a majority of them are on some sort of these kinds of medications and they still suffer from all the same thoughts and moods that I do.

There's one thing that we pre/mid-menopausal ladies do to ourselves, besides buy into the illusion that doctors are really trying to help. We turn on each other. Not turn TO each other, but turn ON each other. Right at a time of life when we need to circle the wagons around one another and be understanding, we emotionally stamp our own foot and take stands against a friend "taking advantage" of us. Admittedly this is a solution that is probably needed somewhere in our lives, but misdirected toward the wrong target. Having meaningful friendships with other women is VERY important for us. But, it's more common that we are isolating ourselves from those friendships because we won't take the time to be understanding and reach outside of ourselves. We are so invested in our families and their needs that it's too easy to excuse our lack of outside relationships. When understanding and compassion is needed for yet one more person in our lives, it's common for women to feel we are being taken advantage of or that person isn't adding anything to our own lives, only sucking it more dry. So we distance and isolate ourselves from those other ladies. It's just easier. After all, we must take care of ourselves and think about ourselves for once. Or so we're told.

I challenge all women to take care of themselves by making sure to add a few meaningful relationships with other women into our daily lives. Not just a couple times a year, but on a regular basis. It's not easy. It's hard. It's work. We have to think outside of ourselves. But it's so worth it! The benefits to our physical being and our mental being is tremendous. We may actually live longer and healthier. Now, isn't that cheaper than taking a bunch of medications we really don't need?

There are no words for...

Well, Day 11 is ending. It's been quite a ride. A slow, painful, frustrating, infuriating, numbing ride. When I arrived Dad was in the hospital hospice ward. He could get to/from the bathroom with a little assistance and was eating a few bites of solid hospital foods. He could speak, hoarsely, but words were there. Three days after my arrival, I brought him home. Nothing much changed the next day or so, but on the tail end of the second day going into day three, he started heading downhill fast. He suddenly couldn't get to the bathroom on his legs even with my assistance. His appetite, as little as it had been, bottomed out to nothing. He has become mostly unresponsive and taking his meds in liquid form as its the only way to get them in him.

Now, my mother, being one of those mothers that fixes all things with food, simply wasn't grasping the fact that food was no longer an option. But when she was made to understand this fact, it seemed to be the only way she was capable of "helping". She abdicated her mind and has been fuzzy on the business that needs to be taken care of...financial, as well as burial arrangements. This mother and father of mine, that had always been ultimately responsible and foresightful, failed to make plans for their eventual demise. Absolutely no plans had been made and they were clueless as to what they were to do. Now, as abdicated as she may be, she still has not relinqueshed the real "power". I my typical get-things-done manner, I have made phone calls, researched, and laid out the options...better yet, the best option. All that is needed is the say so to move forward. But that is not coming. As if I haven't done or said a word on any of the subjects, she will meander her conversations into "plans" that she thinks things should be. And they couldn't be any further from reality, much less a workable option.

In the meantime, neighbors, hospice and local pastors and chaplains have made a steady stream into our home daily since having a hospital bed brought in and simply keeping him "comfortable" is our job. As I watch the ravages that this insipid cancer does to this human body, I don't believe he's truly comfortable at all. But the medicines do keep him in another world. I guess that's something. Again I wonder...why don't we hear more about this out there in the world?