Visiting Non-Gluten-Free Relatives

I'm going to try very hard to not use this post as my therapy for the week. I don't know about your family, but mine is challenging. And I'm going to stop right there from going any further in explaining. But I think many of us have faced the dilemma of how to eat and deal with meals at relatives homes. Personally, I've only dealt with needing to be gluten-free for seven years. Seeing as I have a grown son, that means my side of the family never had to deal with such things for me. When its not my kitchen, my menu plans or others' desires for eating out, having a real need to be gluten-free can be challenging for us and very annoying for others.

I think it's very normal for most family members to think we can eat most of the same dishes that have been beloved traditions, just minus a small ingredient or two. But when those ingredients are glutinous, the substitutions can often completely change a dish. AND a large number of those that are Celiac or gluten-intolerant are likely to have issues with other foods, most predominantly, dairy or eggs. Again, foods that can and will totally change the outcome of many dishes when substituted. You can see how you and your needs suddenly become a real thorn in others' sides when family favorites no longer turn out the same. Some people are very intolerant of Thanksgiving dishes varying from what they grew up with or the finger foods of Super Bowls or the fancy extravagances of New Year's. But there are a number of things you can try. You might not get it right this year or even next year. But, in time, you stumble onto things that work FOR YOU. Seeing that we are looking just ahead to Thanksgiving, let's think about this a bit now.

If you will be at someone else's home, TRY to talk with them but don't demand that everything changes or caters to you. Take a look at the menu items. Which ones are the sacred cows? Would they be easy to rework? If not, don't bother trying. Think through this some ahead of time and have a suggestion for yourself and anyone else that may want to try and offer to make it. The only things you need to concern yourself with then is the possible cross-contamination of the kitchen when preparing it and maybe a special way to label your gluten-free dishes when they are out on the buffet table. And label your utensil for that item also so no one uses it to dip something else. Maybe setting the gluten-free items off to the side away from the other items would be a good idea also. Pointing out that naturally gluten-free dishes that are simple, whole foods is a very good thing might spark ideas of how a meal could be enhanced. If the kitchen, suggestions, family members are just too difficult resistant, then resign yourself to doing for yourself as needed. We have enough options these days at a lot of grocery stores and online to not be hungry. And remember, after all, it's not REALLY about the food. It's not. Family is often a double-edged sword during the holidays. But they are family. Embrace that fact. It's about them. And it's about you as part of them. Be the bigger person, if need be, and let their resistance roll off. One thing I've learned about the gluten-free path is that it changes. We continue to learn and we adapt. Even when we think we've arrived, next year will have something new in our knowledge and ability to deal with it easier. I know it all seems much easier to me this year than it did last. And the same for the year prior to that. This may be a big thing in our life but in the grand picture of things, it's a small thing. And I've heard we aren't suppose to sweat those.

Wow, long time no write

I have no idea why I haven't written in so long. The only explanation is life. Life and moods. Have I ever mentioned I'm just FULL of moods? I'll give you a rundown of life around here. And a few thoughts. Maybe this will be the "choke" to getting the engine going again. Don't know what a choke is? Then I'm MUCH older than you.

I made my bi-annual trip to Kansas to visit my mother. With every visit, I am reminded each and every time that I would be a raving maniac if I lived closer and that living 1000 miles away is almost as frustrating. And its the only time I feel very cursed for being an only child. Continued hoarding and her complete belief and insistance that keeping ALL her "pretty" stuff is completely normal although she isn't very capable. And her insistance on driving is just things nightmares are made.

The holidays were spent in relative quietness. Enjoyed lots of family time with my hubby, son and dog.

The normalcy returned at turn of the new year. My son began his monthly treks to his drum corp weekend camps to ready for the new season. He is their field director this year, which will be his last, as he "ages out" this year. His mother gains several more gray hair as he drives the approximate 240 roundtrip miles in Michigan winter weather. February brought a home accident for my husband, costing him 3 broken fingers needing surgery. One required pins and one required the amputation of the top joint. The blessing was that it wasn't worse and it was his left hand. He's right handed. But God has blessed his recovery and he is on the downhill side albeit the physical therapy.

We have been reading and internalizing some great articles and blogs on minimalism. We have reached a stage in life we are very tired of all the years of accumlumating stuff and moving this stuff for the many cross-country moves we've made through the years. We've moved many a box full from house-to-house, state-to-state without opening once in many, many years. After realizing what hanging onto STUFF has done to both of our parents, we decided we desired to do differently. We don't want to wait till we are too old to do something about it. We want the freedom. And most of all, we don't want to do to our son what we will have to deal with our parents' belongings. So we have slowly been going through things and making periodic trips to our local Salvation Army. Its really exciting to think that someone will actually use stuff we have long forgotten about or no longer use.

Even though I haven't been writing on my blog lately, I have been considering possible new directions for it. Perhaps less random. Even though I enjoy discussing whatever is on my mind, I'm considering advice to be more "thematic". Do you have any thoughts on that? I would love to hear from you.

"The Search for God and Guinness"

What a privilege it's been to read Stephen Mansfield's "The Search for God and Guinness: A Biography of the Beer that Changed the World". I was especially intrigued by the title and it was immediately a must read for me. The respect that Mansfield gives the history of the Guinness family is quite apparent as he gives account of the lineage from the first Arthur Guinness through each generation, the apparent heirs along the way and how each made their mark in making the brand "Guinness" into what it is today. He tells the story of the God-given talents given to many in the family that resulted in three main categories of Guinnesses, the Brewing Guinnesses, the Banking Guinnesses and the Guinnesses for God. He also provides a very good overview of how beer was accepted and its purpose through the ages in accordance with religious views of the times.

I truly loved this book. Having grown up in a small denomination that embraced the Prohibition, my own views of alcohol use has evolved slowly, albeit it has evolved. I loved the time travel through religious views through the ages and how beer and alcohol was part of the culture and easily accepted as a healthy choice and necessary choice, in many cases. The religious overview was very helpful and held my attention. The only problem I had in reading this book was keeping straight which generation accomplished which milestones and accomplishments due to family names being passed down from fathers to sons. But I certainly don't blame Mansfield for my confusion.

I highly recommend this book to anyone that is interested in history, business practices and how one person's faith and integrity has built a brand and a family that is still highly revered two hundred fifty years later. If you are like I was, open your mind and consider something that is bigger than your box. You'll be so glad you did.

Ready, set....

I have come to grips with what is coming. I've had the time to find a "home" inside myself with my place and purpose. I know that there are still alot of unknowns, but I have found something inside me that says I can do this.

My father was placed in the hospital for pain management and they discovered a blot-clot in his leg. The meds used to dissolve and manage his pain finally kicked in and started giving him enough relief that he was resting better and sounded rested. There is a little voice to his hoarseness also. So, I'm hopeful that when I get there, he will be in better spirits and be ready to face the business of making arrangements and talking through everything that needs to be talked through.

My own husband and son have left me alone just the right amount and reassured me that things will happen as they should. I am reminded that even when things aren't done "right", they do get done and "well enough". I will miss some key days and activities with them, but I am also realizing that I can actually grow in many ways, and different ways, closer to them through my time away.

So, here I go.